So Jasper is not very impressed with the cheap food. Sounds like he has been spreading the news about it to all his little feline friends.
I noticed that recently, as I was going to give him a hug, that the little tiger scampered around me and ran for Str8 (who was waving the bag of food at him)..but now that we have nasty cheap crap to feed him, we ll see how long he keeps going to Mr. Str8 first…..
Betrayed by my kitty. I am gutted. And now for my revenge…I have a can of moist food, stashed away. I will be armed, and not afraid to use it, to get back into good graces with little J… MAUUUUHHHHAAAAAHAAAAAA!!!!
For the past two years Mr. Str8 has been the man, and pretends to be all that and a cold bag of hearts. (for animals) But we all know the deal.
So he developed an affection to my stray outdoor pet, Jasper.
He started taking to feeding the cat.. and on the next market outing after running out of catfood….
Str8 pushed the cart into the pet food aisle. I gave him a signature B-Diva look..and curiously asked what he was doing.
He took to making sure my suckin’ up kitty was getting fed. Several months later after a good amount of $ on food for the needy kitty, we were at the market again.
“Oh yeah and cat food. Get the cheap storebrand shit. If the little fucker doesn’t like the cheap stuff… oh well. Cat will starve then.”
As if he would let that happen..but we all know it wouldn’t.. Stra8 to the market after I get to work to buy food the cat will eat….
don’t tell him we know the secret!
So.. finally making the effort to show Mr. Str8 the blog that is making him infamous.. (really bad judgement on my behalf as he has had 2 large screwdrivers)..and chatting on MSN.. and some reasons why I m enjoying this too much:
1) That he has a buzz and he gets really funny
2)That he got frustrated as I was acting like a 5yr old hitting his arm “look at my blog honey. look at my blog honey..LOOK at MY blog!!”…
3)that he admitted to me “I can’t do both things at the same time babe..can I look at your blog later..I want to know more about blogs”
3 Good reasons why laughing at ourselves and each other is a good thing when people love each other…..
Grocery shopping at the market with Mr. Str8….(early on in the relationship)
Taking in the dollar amount of the buggy that keeps getting fuller and fuller, and more and more name brands and unessentials. (Which I have never done.. as I always had to watch every dollar being a poor writer)… I stopped and Mr. Str8 looked up at me with a questioning look.
“This is getting to be too much babe. Are you should we need this?” I waved at the cart.
“What? I am not eating the crap you buy. You only live once. So whatever.”
Needless to say.. I started to get used to not eating the crap I used to buy…hello Humpty Dumpty, g’bye compliments…
“…………Ah… are you listenin to me mister?” I said to Mr. Str8 one night as we watched TV.
“Huh? Sorry. I was thinking about the crotch on that guy in the car commerical…”
Like I say.. my man lives up to his name…
“Tomato look how soft and mushy you are. No, I am not going to spare you. Oh yeah, I am so cutting you up, you sad little broken thing”
“Aw…celery..wilted and pale..(giving it a good shake)..reminds me of a guy I once dated…”
“Cucumber…ah I know you well…the things I’ve done to and with some of your relatives….”
“That goes for you too Mr. Carrot….”
“Gonna mix you all up in a bowl…y’all better get along or else!”
One memorable night getting ready to go to the bar:
We had been going to the bar a lot, often enough to be considered regulars. This one time, after a rather long lazy day, Mr. Str8 realized the time, and was afraid we would be ‘late’ (as if showing up before midnight was late). He proceeded to rush us to get ready. As it was customary, I showered first (I take less shower time, more prep time). Once all dressed, and mere moments from leaving, (after being half an hour ‘late already’)…
I find Mr. Str8 standing in front of the mirror, obsessively trying to do something with his hair. With mumbled curses, grunts, and a rather comical expression, he was getting angry. I was nearly barreled down as he stormed off into the bathroom.
I was left standing in diva stance, waving a hand about, wearing a deadly expression on my face. “Ah, hello? You yell at me saying we’re late…WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
“I can’t go looking like this. My hair won’t do what I want, so I’m washing it again.”
And I’m the diva….????
Well.. its a long time coming. But I have had a roller coaster ride to get here. Why on earth do we think we can let others take control of our lives? I love my Mr. Str8, but the road to this pit stop has been a long and dramatic one. I just spent an hour creeping my own Facebook pix. And I’m not sure I really like what I see. I packed on the pounds again. I had one hot summer, and as it is nearly Pride Week in Halifax, I am vodka full of ideas and plans. Yes, I can see the errors of my ways. Of keeping up the blinders to the fact I feel as if I lost myself again. This time, not because I am forced to be the dutiful son and care for my mother who lasted 6.. count em.. 6 long years after my father died. But nearly 2 years with Mr. Str8, and its like I am Alice looking through the looking glass.
I know all the right things to say and do. But not enough to keep me as I was. I feel self-loathing again and ladies and gentlemen.. that is not cool. I have a great life. I love the man I am with.. but is that the issue? Or is it that I stopped loving myself that I am lamenting with vodka in ginger ale (diet, thankfully) that I am working on regaining my strenght?
I have much baggage I need to open, and if you are willing, I will share it with you all. After all, I am interested in having my own reallity show. So, I have to start somewhere right? I feel as if I have become lazy and that has not been me for sometime. And I need to make changes.
Is anyone following me here? Or am I putting this out there for my own recourse?
Anywhoodles.. just thought I would make a post. I will be back soon, my wordpress peeps..
Have a good time and remember.. it’s a blood bath out there. Take care of you, and each other.