Imagine the World If the Gays Took Over…

Imagine the world if the gays took over.  We would get the most masculine hollywood stars dress in drag, and parade in heels in Buttfuck anywhere, USA.  We would have a badboy dress up in bad 70s polyester suits, and have sex with other men.  (Since he WAS married to Madonna, not a stretch for him, we all know).  We would have musical films, and dance films, and little wizards in plays in glorious nudity.  We would have dudes kissing each other, while searching for a car.  TV would have even more musicals, with hot young stars, in various states of undress on a weekly basis.  We would have competition shows for models, porn stars, singers, dancers, and even put a few in a fake house and watch them, 24/7.  And there would be hot guys galore.  We could have sci-fi with man-on-man sex, lots of kissing and lewd comments. 

Imagine the world if the gays took over.  We would have cell phones that multi-task: phones, cameras, and the internet.  (To tweet conquests and keep up with that little skinny bitch who posts YouTube music videos every ten minutes of Pink, Madonna, Brittney Spears).  These new gadgets would be called G-somethings.  G2, G3, G4… Not standing for Generation, but for Gay…  We would snap dirty pix of ourselves, and share it with the world.  Instantly.  Start sexting, and figure out what not to wear.  (There’s an app for that).

Imagine the world if the gays took over.  Kilts would appear season after season, in fashion weeks around the world, worn by men created of bone, muscle and flesh.  And they would wear purses.  Pants will have velcro, and be made of mesh, sheer materials and leather.  More magazines will have men on the cover, and offer to reveal secrets about pleasing him in intimate ways, to try to keep him at home, and not running the roads.  Make-up will make all men look younger, and more photogenic.

Imagine the world if the gays took over.  BBQs will have more surface space, for those intimate, tailgating parties with the bros.  There would be warming compartments, and shelving, for spices, and serving vessels in the latest pastels, with logos from sports teams, so that the bros feel the manly love of grilled meat, veggies and even BBQ devil’s food cake, with extra creamy cream frosting.   All, conveniently prepared on the all-in-one BBQ, nestled beside the swimming pool, and over-sized hot tub, where guys can relax and share conversations, pressed up in the hot water, against each other.

Imagine the world if the gays took over.  Cars would be more environmentally friendly, would have space to stretch out, for those times you just can’t make it home to pull off a private time with the bro u meet on the street corner, or at that club. 

Imagine the world if the gays took over.  Politicians would have the chance to get to know the bros in their districts, one-on-one, or in group conventions, at the most luxurious hotels.  (With a private excercise room, sauna, and spa). 

Imagine the world if the gays took over…..ah.. oh, ok.. never mind.  Look s like we already took over.  Why am I the last the know??? Damnit!

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Filed under Humour, Silly Me

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