Tag Archives: opinion

the Ides of April

funny how sometimes the universe sends you a message you cannot ignore.  And in the dark, it is the light that finds you, and the fear and pain can wash away.  I have just been in this position.  And while I try to make light of somethings, sometimes you need to acknowledge the complexities that is life.  And, in turn dead.

So, in my pitiful life, worrying about the end of employment, and dealing with pettiness, my sister had to deliver sad news.  A dear, wonderful family friend died.  And not just any one, but a selfless, compassionate and angelic like human being.  Anna was a light in the gloom of the world.  Never a mean thing to say, she was always loving.  Even when cancer began to attack, and Anna suffer, she took no easy way out, no more than she needed.  Her philosophy was always, ‘there is someone worse off than me.  Let them have it.’  And as she fought the good fight, month after month, she still was a shining light.  And last week, the last once of fight left Anna, and she was no longer an angel on Earth, as she was returned to where she was needed next.  And all those lives she touched, remembered her.

And from that, my sister returned home, to a sick husband.  And the horror of his being so sick, that he collapsed.  My sister, ever the force, did what she needed to.  My brother-in-law is a good man.  And he held on, in ICU, with my sister at his side.  And in hospital, he has gotten better.  And getting better.  And we are grateful.  Not unlike Anna, my sister is an amazing human being.  Loving, compassionate, and strong.  A light in this world.

My good friend also got bad news.  Her nephew, who came to defend another, was shot dead for his stand.  And a young man, taken out of this world by an act of violence.  And it rippled out, a family trying to make sense of such a loss.  So young and promising.  Senseless.

And today, it seems more senselessness… A member of the gay community in Halifax, a much loved, and wonderful human being, was beaten violently to death.  Raymond Taavel, came to the defense of another human being and paid with his life.  I knew of him, but a moment in time.  I meet Raymond the first day I was at the local gay bar, about a week after my mother died, and I was on my own.  I sat with him and his friends, and we drank, and ate.  We talked about writing, and many times after, when I would go to the bar, he was there.  Always a smile, always positive.   Always a chat.  He was brutually killed by a psychiatric patient who was allowed an unescorted leave.  He failed to return.  Raymond tried to defend his friend when, by the reports, the patient was accosting him.  And paid with his life.  Metro Halifax Regional Police arrested him.  There was a vigil for Raymond.  A downtown street was blocked virtually last minute, for the honour of a key member of the gay community, of the city.

In a world of diversity, of good and bad, it makes life a balance.  It seems for me, that the lives of many have intersected, that in the wake of death, of serious health issues, of loss, the balance of the universe will find a way to give us messages.  To remind us that life is precious, and short.  That any one of us, could be off this mortal coil in a last heart beat.  That good, positive people can be taken.  And while  we do not understand, or agree, that we feel anger and resentment, we all must find something good.  I wish to find the goodness, the light, the positive of good people, and try to live life with the honour, for those taken before their time, or at the end of a long road.  I choose to live up to the strength of good people.  For Anna, for my sister, my brother-in-law, my friend’s nephew, and for Raymond.  For me, in my own world, I wish to follow the strength of my family.  Heroes come in many fashions, in  many statures, but  the way someone lives life, speaks volumes to the balance of the universe.  Anna, my sister, are two of my heroes.  And Raymond.  We question why for tragic events.  It is what we do after, that defines us, our futures.  It is the universe’s way to keep us honest.  And what we do in this world, is the best way to reply to the messages of the universe, after the ides of April…

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Equality For All?

Under the notion that all are created equal, it then would seem to me, (and I am rather slanted in this), that we all have the same potential to do good and bad.  That individual growth will shape us, and the world around us.  Some may have less to work with, while others have D&G, four-leaf clovers and Iphones shooting out of their blow holes.

If this ideal is to be used by any group or organization, then really, wouldn’t they see the vast sea of variations?  Or is that too much to ask for?  That the mission statement of a communal philosophy should recognize that we are all full of potential? 

I do not remember ever hearing ‘all whom we deem equal, we shall honour them’….  Well, maybe the likes of Hitler…

We all bleed the same.  We all feel emotion.  We all do the best with what we have.  Some manage better than others.  Some cannot look to the light. 

Have we really evolved to the point of equality, or are we on the brink of sliding back down that slick, hateful hill into the abyss?  How equal are we really?

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Wedded Bliss? A Rant on Marriage

Marriage (or wedlock) is a social union or legal contract between people that creates kinship. The definition of marriage varies according to different cultures, but is usually an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged. Such a union, often formalized via a wedding ceremony, may also be called matrimony. Many cultures limit marriage to two persons of the opposite sex, but some allow forms of polygamous marriage, and some recognize same-sex marriage. In some conservative cultures, marriage is recommended or compulsory before pursuing any sexual activity.

People marry for many reasons, including one or more of the following: legal, social, libidinal, emotional, economic, spiritual, and religious. These might include arranged marriages, family obligations, the legal establishment of a nuclear family unit, the legal protection of children and public declaration of commitment.[1][2]The act of marriage usually creates normative or legal obligations between the individuals involved. Some cultures allow the dissolution of marriage through divorce or annulment.  (as from wikipedia)

Recently, I learned of a gay couple who seem to be engaged, as per a social media status update.  I am very much a supporter of marriage, gay or otherwise, in relation to love, and the commitment of two individuals.  I am a romantic, believe in love, and the soul mate ideal.  The above two paragraphs are from wikipedia. In the second, it gives reasons for many to decide to be married.  I do not presume to know the workings of someone else’s relationship….however…

It has taken way too long for humanity to deal with each other, to have a fair and equal world.  I know, not there yet but a work in progress.  Rights granted, blah blah…

My issue is that this:  If we fight for rights and equality, then shouldn’t we have some level of respect for the things we have?  Freedom of will and liberty is great.  But if gays can marry, should not we attempt to honourable? 

Straight couples have enjoyed the highs and lows of marriage from the beginning.  And while there are those that disrespect the institution and what it stands for, and there are those, as well, who value its ideals and beliefs.  With so many hetros on their own narrow view point, it makes gay marriage difficult if it is not done for the purest of reasons: love.  Man/woman marriages have been for love, money, and a myriad of reasons.  Let us face this: gay rights may picking up speed in our world, but stereotypes remain.  Gays are seen as dirty, promiscuous, and an afront to the meaning of marriage.  So, if a couple of gays who are looking to get hitched for concerns of finance, or status, rather than love and being only 2 joined in intimacy, then, how in the name of all that is Elton John, can we get away from being the demon if we put it all out there?  that we say, meh, marriage ok even if it’s not for love.  Really? 

Why would a couple of sleep-around-seths want to get married?  Sure, makes senes for the straights.  Look  step-ford family, raise kids, but really, you are schlanking the rest of the suburban street, at  the ‘swappers’ party.  You would need marriage to be the beard, if you all are bed hopping.  Well, gays do that regardless.  Unless we got kids, there is no real need to get into matrimony other than love.  Ok you may say, not so.  Seriously?  ok then, let’s see.  Money/finances?  How about investments?  RRSPs?  Will marriage make this couple I know of better?  Hardly.  If they give up trying to win the skank equivalent of the Best Picture Oscar, then meh, ok.  They marry for love.  Forsake all others.  I ll buy them a blender.

However, if we think that just because we now can marry, should we?  The straights have the corner on seedy, secret, scandalous sexual affairs of married couples.  Really, for us gays, we accept this, rather embrace this, and damn many of us are good at being tramps.  So, maybe thanks to that fabulous other red head Julia Roberts and that fine (well, not so recently) Richard Gere, the gays got the marriage bug.  That even though they are amateur porn stars, they too can live the dream. 

If gays make the committment to tie the knot, then why can’t they do it for the spirit and the letter of marriage?  And make it about romance and not how many times you can play hide wet  twirl the cabaret stick…. And if you detected some resentment, you would be right.  I have resigned myself to the knowledge that unless Mr. Str8 is left a vegetable and unable to stop me from forcing him to marry me… I will never be a bride.  And I am pretty ok with it.  I dream of being married.  I just really think those gays who count more sex partners than jelly beans while in a relationship should really just stay the course.  And leave marriage to the gays who are a better example of human equality, who truly are the marrying kind.  Those of us who believe in love, romance and being the only two,  in a party of two.   By the powers of blogging,  I now pronounce you rant and rant, and may you may rant on….

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Follow Me And I Will Follow You: And Other Semi-Truths

Social networking allows for creative, talented, and ego-centric individuals the chance to share, interact, learn, connect.

Getting into the wordpress, tumblr, twiter end of community sharing, you virtually are at the front door, in all your nakedness and inviting strangers into your home.  Ok, not so much your home, as in your etherworld net site.  Naked, well, if that clicks your like button, then ok…  We have the facebooks, with many people we have actually met-friends, co-workers, family, what have you.  Even the strangers there, we have for some common reason.  When we open up to blogs, and the like, then we suddenly have less familiarity with those that randomly come by chance upon your masterpiece.  How many people do we actually know on these things?  I can see really cool, youthful student types, the artistes, all flocking to blog.  A mutual admiration society.  Gosh, that sounds so fun!

They post, then read, share, comment and follow each other.  Flock of Lemmings, release their debut CD, Blog Blood Bud.  I actually know only one blogger, who has a right cool blog.  Everyone else are strangers with the potential of being friends.

Mysterious shimmering apparitions travelling the optic digital galaxy.  (Shimmering, well, I like shiny things).  And some randomly find their way onto our blogs.  Some pass by without acknowledgment.  Some, glance.  Others take time to read.  Once your phamtasimistic visit enjoys, they make themselves known, by giving you a sign.  Liking, following, commenting… some how, they let you know, ‘hey, I was here’.  Just like those annoying ‘killroy was here’ graffiti. 

On occasion, you encounter these surfers of the web, and they join in your commune.  I mean, following your blog.  And, since your new and eager like a puppy, you take a trip to their blog, and check them out.  Finding out that the surface is very different from your own, you think, ‘ok, I know I am fabulous, but really?  You?  Me?’  Ok, whatever.  Cool.  And you are courteous and read and comment on their recent posting.  Funny thing… seems they suddenly disappeared again into the void.  Ok?

These over excited visitors are impulsive, and tend to like and follow everything.  Like a holic..you know the type.  Addictive personalities, Alcoholic, chocoholic, jersey shoroholic….

These blogaholics, do not see the bigger picture.  If you post the best post ever, they think ‘huh, I want to follow this one’.  But, you later realize, this most amazing blogger is not someone you generally like, support or associate with.  Blindsided, they rush to disconnect from you.  I see, so, the review of the new restaurant made you think I was a professional food critic, and you are obsessed with food critics, so say restraining orders stacked on your new lawyer’s desk?  Ah, so the photos of the garden, because it had red, white and blue, you followed then realized that it was shot by (insert the faction of humanity you lest like) and oops, unfollow!

Really?  I am green and new to all this blog stuff.  I set it up, post, check out the fresh awesomeness, and like.  Truly, there is no way to actually follow every one of the gifted bloggers.  I have yet to read, and jump on board, only to change my mind.

And, my observation is not a random rant, as I can tie it to relationships.  Now follow me on this one.  People like many more posts than they follow.  We all like other people, however, we do not date them all.  EEEW.  We try really hard to have that feeling for someone special.  Likewise, for following.  I feel drawn to many, but I try to only connect with ones more likely to be long-lasting.  I will return to those that I remember, and check them out again.  We try to follow those that give us the most impact.  

Some of us, though, are serial followers, and hop blog to blog, loving all.  We call them sleazy.  (I have many other words for them).  I will like as many as I can.  Even if I have to seek out a different post, per se, I will try to like everyone.  But, follow?  I do want to follow everyone, the problem is that I have such a short attention span as it is, I will sacrifice many if I try to organize reading everyone.   I will get to this one four times a week, while ten others sob in loneliness for my cruel absence. 

I would be blog-ho, truly, I would.  So, please accept my humble apologies now, in case I miss you.  I will never follow you, and leave you.  I am a monogamous blog-follower. I may blog and tell, but I only follow where my heart takes me.

So, with my ego bruised, I think medications for my delusions of grandeur are more than necessary.  In  fact I demand it.  Then maybe I will not worry about who follows me or not.  After all, it is all about following yourself first, before anyone else can follow you.

With all my following….

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My New Year’s Wish/ Happy New Year!

And here we are, one day left to 2011, and a brand new year about to start.

Hoping you all had a great Christmas, or what have you (holiday), we have the next major one about to hit.

And it is the time of reflection, coupled with the determination to move on, up and forward all at the same time.  Life takes a toll on even the best of us.  No matter how positive, sweet, or wonderful moments have been in the year, it feels like we stand before a marker, and like a runner, we gauge our progress in life.  Sometimes we amaze ourselves at the distance we covered.  Sometimes, we see the starting line right behind us, and feel unaccomplished. 

 

In daily routines, we oft find ourselves near empty and on autopilot just to get through some rougher spots.  We get lax on proper eating, or maybe sleep, even our relationships may suffer along the way.  We find hours that drag, days that seem endless, months painfully long. 

 

In many moments in a year, we have joy, happiness and fond memories.  Of friends, family and lovers.  We grew as people in everything we do.  And those that see the lessons, are the ones who move forward in the game of the universe.  It is in the dwindling hours of such passages of time that we begin to take stock on the travel we have done.  It is but in these moments we see most clarity and the raw emotions that it brings.  The closing of a year is nostalgic for even those things we generally tend to forget or brush aside.

 

2011 was a full year.  For the billions of our brothers and sisters, there were heart aches, tragedies, trauma, and suffering.  Violent weather placed upon the lands saw the might of nature in throes of it’s own struggles.  Protests, wars, conflicts, battles. 

We have had courage, love, honour and miracle stories.  We have laughed, cried, and sampled all emotions.  Some lives ended and many new lives were started.

When we look back on our own personal year, let us not focus on the negative, but rather, take the goals and battles lost as fuel to make 2012 positive.  Lessons are learned in all things we do, say and feel.  The interactions we have with each other.  Look to your heart, to your soul, and find the fire that will guide you into the next chapter of your life.  Dream dreams that bring you peace and share all the good that you have.  May you know the touch of a hand of a loved one on your face.  The look of love in the eyes of a life partner.  Of encouraging words to a youngster.  The wisdom of the elderly.  Look to finding the special thing that only you have to share.  And join in the celebrations of all humanity.

May you embrace the beginning of a new year with smiles and fun.  Be safe and smart, and dance like you never danced before.  Celebrate the times that you will write upon the blank pages that lay before you in the story of your life.  And hold onto the pages written even in the worst moments, as they will reveal secrets about the person you were, and the person you are meant to be.

My wish for all of us is a simple, grand one.  Cast aside the prejudices and stand up for justice and peace.  May we all have the chance to dance as we like, to sing as off-key and loud as we can.  May you be proud of the amazing creature you are, and of those loved ones around you, even of the accomplishments of those you do not know.  Take time to live life out loud, and be a voice that others can follow, and follow those that shine a light, not those that would inflict darkness and cruelty. 

No matter who you are, where you live, what colour of your eyes, hair or skin. No matter the religion and faith, you must believe.  No matter what box you check for your age.  No matter your gender, or sexuality, be the best you can be.  Foster love in the world, not hate, and find the strength to overcome those that would threaten to darken the light of life.

As a year draws to an end, and a new one about to begin, take a moment to pass goodness on to those around you.  We all suffer, but through the pain, we can be strong and rise above this mortal coil to achieve something great.  And let 2012 be the year we set the goal.  Learn to say NO when you need to and YES when you can.

My wish for you all is to have a fabulous, safe New Years, full of love and peace.  Party on.  Be proud.  And in the words of the grand diva herself, RuPaul, “don’t f*@# it up!”

New Year’s Eve, 2011, a day before the start of the brand new 2012. 

Happy New Year, one and all.  And thank you for taking time to share of your time with me.  Much love and appreciation.

Bryon, therealbryon

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This Diva Aint No Twilight Diva

As it seems to be a hot topic, I figured I would share my point of view on the ‘Sparkly’.

And by ‘sparkly’, I mean the new ‘Twilight’ trip.  And, I am aware, that by doing so, I may become subject to certain loathing.  Of the act of being attacked in a violent, and brutal manner, by ‘Twilight’ers.

Firstly, let us just say- Vampires do not sparkle.  Now, on that note, I concede to being all creative-like.  After all, I say writers should support each other.  That as a writer, I believe that I can create anything I want.  And, if I want to put something in a blender to do as I will, well, damnit, I will.  That, however, does not excuse people who take what the world accepts as virtually true, and make it their own.  To bastardize folklore and make it pretty enough for tweens.  Shit, I was never allowed to see supernatural stuff like that at twelve.  I snuck it, on my own, or with my dad.

I am envious that someone could take tweenage angst and romance and spin it into vampires that sparkle in daylight (??!!!)

Good on you.  I would have done it too.  Well, without the prissy sparkling vampire.  And that’s coming from a romance loving diva.  I like sparkles.  Just not on vampires.  Even on Kellan Lutz.  (mmm)

One Vampire I would love to be biten by

Like really.  I want a vampire to be sexy, hot, a dream.  I want them to be dangerous. Like bloody dangerous.  Not clingy and spewing more drama than a Kardashian.  (Now, that’s scary!)  I want to be offended in my soul on the viciousness of a vampire.  I want mist, and swarms of bats, and mental illness obsession.  Not broody boy bitches.  (Well, not on a regular basis.  Although there was that one time in that gay bar in Hungary..)

Fine.  There is massive following of lemmings, fans.  The unnatural love of a vampire and a mortal.  Of a werewolf and a mortal.  I am all for triangles.  Mostly they involve XXX.  But for the wee people, not old enough to stay at the mall past 8pm, I think the portrayal of Belle is shit.  Strong willed heroine?  More like saucy, defiant, and boo-whoo sob story.  Poor Belle.  Please.  As a cop, her father needs to cuff her one.

I would rather watch this...wont, but would rather..

Pattison, or whatever, may be an ok actor.  But not my cup of hotness.  The tween world has these sad, romantic, one ball bois.  Skinny as a rake.  Annoying in sensitivity.  Really?  I enjoy more manly leads.

Give me Kellan Lutz any day.  Really, can someone wrap him up for me? That is a wicked vampire.  He could be so sinister, so emotive.  I would trust that vampire in a dark alley.. well, sure you can see where that thought is going….

I can see him, a la Anne Rice, playing with mortals like toys, feasting gorily on criminals.  Now, that’s hot! 

Best werewolf.. nothing pretty about this one..

Mind you, I have seen the first 2 flicks.  The first, I was dragged by my ex-roommate, along with my other roomie/niece.  I sat there in near boredom.  And then… the vision of Emmett.  Kellan.  And the object of a new stalker obsession.  The second, by…wait for it.. Mr. Str8!  And in this one, the Taylor Lautner perverted obsession began.  I had to use all my napkins to sop up Str8’s drool.  And just like the first movie, I ran home to download a GB of photos of this sweet, pretty boi.

As a werewolf… really?  A lead?  No.  Sorry.  He can play the younger version of the real werewolf star.  Again, it is a tween production.  So, it makes sense to put some real brawn and beauty up against the disco glittering undead Edward.

I was practically falling asleep in the theatre.  Aw.. poor Bella.  Bad vamp bitch chasing her.  Yawn.

And now what?  Teenage pregnancy?  Turn into a third-rate hack job of Rosemary’s Baby?  Really????

Is there a moral in this?  Or is teen pregnancy just a plot device for a story that is highly flawed?  The moral I get, is not to have a Jerry Springer episode of teen breeding, and ‘who’s your daddy’, but rather not to watch this sugary coma inducing crap.

Period. 

Give me ‘An American Werewolf in Paris’.  ‘Bram Stoker’s Dracula’.  ‘Nosferatu’.  ‘Interview with a Vampire’.  Hell, even ‘Elvira’!

Now that's a vampire

What’s next for the pathetic Bella?  Falling for a zombie?  Gremlin?  Hobbit?

Give me one redeeming quality in this series?  Just one.  Other then Kellan, or Taylor’s wet dream-iness?

Calling Bella… ring ring ring.. get a life! 

Put that in you sparkly and smoke it.

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