Tag Archives: society

the Ides of April

funny how sometimes the universe sends you a message you cannot ignore.  And in the dark, it is the light that finds you, and the fear and pain can wash away.  I have just been in this position.  And while I try to make light of somethings, sometimes you need to acknowledge the complexities that is life.  And, in turn dead.

So, in my pitiful life, worrying about the end of employment, and dealing with pettiness, my sister had to deliver sad news.  A dear, wonderful family friend died.  And not just any one, but a selfless, compassionate and angelic like human being.  Anna was a light in the gloom of the world.  Never a mean thing to say, she was always loving.  Even when cancer began to attack, and Anna suffer, she took no easy way out, no more than she needed.  Her philosophy was always, ‘there is someone worse off than me.  Let them have it.’  And as she fought the good fight, month after month, she still was a shining light.  And last week, the last once of fight left Anna, and she was no longer an angel on Earth, as she was returned to where she was needed next.  And all those lives she touched, remembered her.

And from that, my sister returned home, to a sick husband.  And the horror of his being so sick, that he collapsed.  My sister, ever the force, did what she needed to.  My brother-in-law is a good man.  And he held on, in ICU, with my sister at his side.  And in hospital, he has gotten better.  And getting better.  And we are grateful.  Not unlike Anna, my sister is an amazing human being.  Loving, compassionate, and strong.  A light in this world.

My good friend also got bad news.  Her nephew, who came to defend another, was shot dead for his stand.  And a young man, taken out of this world by an act of violence.  And it rippled out, a family trying to make sense of such a loss.  So young and promising.  Senseless.

And today, it seems more senselessness… A member of the gay community in Halifax, a much loved, and wonderful human being, was beaten violently to death.  Raymond Taavel, came to the defense of another human being and paid with his life.  I knew of him, but a moment in time.  I meet Raymond the first day I was at the local gay bar, about a week after my mother died, and I was on my own.  I sat with him and his friends, and we drank, and ate.  We talked about writing, and many times after, when I would go to the bar, he was there.  Always a smile, always positive.   Always a chat.  He was brutually killed by a psychiatric patient who was allowed an unescorted leave.  He failed to return.  Raymond tried to defend his friend when, by the reports, the patient was accosting him.  And paid with his life.  Metro Halifax Regional Police arrested him.  There was a vigil for Raymond.  A downtown street was blocked virtually last minute, for the honour of a key member of the gay community, of the city.

In a world of diversity, of good and bad, it makes life a balance.  It seems for me, that the lives of many have intersected, that in the wake of death, of serious health issues, of loss, the balance of the universe will find a way to give us messages.  To remind us that life is precious, and short.  That any one of us, could be off this mortal coil in a last heart beat.  That good, positive people can be taken.  And while  we do not understand, or agree, that we feel anger and resentment, we all must find something good.  I wish to find the goodness, the light, the positive of good people, and try to live life with the honour, for those taken before their time, or at the end of a long road.  I choose to live up to the strength of good people.  For Anna, for my sister, my brother-in-law, my friend’s nephew, and for Raymond.  For me, in my own world, I wish to follow the strength of my family.  Heroes come in many fashions, in  many statures, but  the way someone lives life, speaks volumes to the balance of the universe.  Anna, my sister, are two of my heroes.  And Raymond.  We question why for tragic events.  It is what we do after, that defines us, our futures.  It is the universe’s way to keep us honest.  And what we do in this world, is the best way to reply to the messages of the universe, after the ides of April…

Leave a comment

Filed under Random, Rant

Why I Wont Be a Parent

Standing in a long line up at the only Tim Horton’s open for blocks from work on Good Friday, with members of peewee hockey and family swarming the joint (it is one of the designer Cold Stone Creamery ice cream cafes)….. I turned to my co-worker on the way out, and grumbled my intolerance.

Me: It’s some tournament or something… I cannot imagine having the money to have a kid in sports.  It must be bloody expensive!

C0-worker: You are right, it is not cheap.

Me: This is why I don’t have kids, man!  Firstly, I would have to work round clock to afford to feed it, and clothe it!  Let alone letting it participate in a team… I would be like “Jr., if you want to play sports, get a job and pay for it yourself!”

Co-worker: (laughing)

Me: No, I’m not kidding!  If my seven-year old asked to play, then he could work for it.  Kathy Lee Gifford had kids making her clothes.  Rose made Gypsy Lee Rose earn her keep….

Co-worker: (laughing, yet appalled)  I don’t think it works that way.  That’s not really legal here.. and as for Rose, I still pretty much think that isn’t legal any more either…

Me: Short of raising it in the Fourth World, I guess you’re right.  Child stars at least don’t have the time to join sports, what with the hours acting on set.. No guarantees it could be cute enough or smart enough to perform.  Even if it is mine.  Ok, well, it would need to earn it’s keep then.  ‘Hey you, clean the house and don’t forget the gutters!  And tomorrow, you’d better be re-tiling the roof if you want to go to the finals with the team!’

Co-worker: (still laughing) You wouldn’t?

Me: Hey, gotta work for it… Ask Donald Trump.  It could help with the groceries too… ‘ok you, take the bags to the car…. no, no cart for you mr. all-star, you are carrying all those bags, and hurry up’…

Co-worker: (shaking his head)  U really shouldn’t have kids.  Hey, You never mentioned lemonade stands, dog walking…

Me: They would never make enough cash that way!  It would drop and spill the drink, or lose all the dogs, and then I would have to pay more out to fix it’s mistakes…. Ah, I  see your point. Well, this is one reason why I won’t be a parent. (sigh)

Leave a comment

Filed under Quotes, Random, Rant, Silly Me

Wedded Bliss? A Rant on Marriage

Marriage (or wedlock) is a social union or legal contract between people that creates kinship. The definition of marriage varies according to different cultures, but is usually an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged. Such a union, often formalized via a wedding ceremony, may also be called matrimony. Many cultures limit marriage to two persons of the opposite sex, but some allow forms of polygamous marriage, and some recognize same-sex marriage. In some conservative cultures, marriage is recommended or compulsory before pursuing any sexual activity.

People marry for many reasons, including one or more of the following: legal, social, libidinal, emotional, economic, spiritual, and religious. These might include arranged marriages, family obligations, the legal establishment of a nuclear family unit, the legal protection of children and public declaration of commitment.[1][2]The act of marriage usually creates normative or legal obligations between the individuals involved. Some cultures allow the dissolution of marriage through divorce or annulment.  (as from wikipedia)

Recently, I learned of a gay couple who seem to be engaged, as per a social media status update.  I am very much a supporter of marriage, gay or otherwise, in relation to love, and the commitment of two individuals.  I am a romantic, believe in love, and the soul mate ideal.  The above two paragraphs are from wikipedia. In the second, it gives reasons for many to decide to be married.  I do not presume to know the workings of someone else’s relationship….however…

It has taken way too long for humanity to deal with each other, to have a fair and equal world.  I know, not there yet but a work in progress.  Rights granted, blah blah…

My issue is that this:  If we fight for rights and equality, then shouldn’t we have some level of respect for the things we have?  Freedom of will and liberty is great.  But if gays can marry, should not we attempt to honourable? 

Straight couples have enjoyed the highs and lows of marriage from the beginning.  And while there are those that disrespect the institution and what it stands for, and there are those, as well, who value its ideals and beliefs.  With so many hetros on their own narrow view point, it makes gay marriage difficult if it is not done for the purest of reasons: love.  Man/woman marriages have been for love, money, and a myriad of reasons.  Let us face this: gay rights may picking up speed in our world, but stereotypes remain.  Gays are seen as dirty, promiscuous, and an afront to the meaning of marriage.  So, if a couple of gays who are looking to get hitched for concerns of finance, or status, rather than love and being only 2 joined in intimacy, then, how in the name of all that is Elton John, can we get away from being the demon if we put it all out there?  that we say, meh, marriage ok even if it’s not for love.  Really? 

Why would a couple of sleep-around-seths want to get married?  Sure, makes senes for the straights.  Look  step-ford family, raise kids, but really, you are schlanking the rest of the suburban street, at  the ‘swappers’ party.  You would need marriage to be the beard, if you all are bed hopping.  Well, gays do that regardless.  Unless we got kids, there is no real need to get into matrimony other than love.  Ok you may say, not so.  Seriously?  ok then, let’s see.  Money/finances?  How about investments?  RRSPs?  Will marriage make this couple I know of better?  Hardly.  If they give up trying to win the skank equivalent of the Best Picture Oscar, then meh, ok.  They marry for love.  Forsake all others.  I ll buy them a blender.

However, if we think that just because we now can marry, should we?  The straights have the corner on seedy, secret, scandalous sexual affairs of married couples.  Really, for us gays, we accept this, rather embrace this, and damn many of us are good at being tramps.  So, maybe thanks to that fabulous other red head Julia Roberts and that fine (well, not so recently) Richard Gere, the gays got the marriage bug.  That even though they are amateur porn stars, they too can live the dream. 

If gays make the committment to tie the knot, then why can’t they do it for the spirit and the letter of marriage?  And make it about romance and not how many times you can play hide wet  twirl the cabaret stick…. And if you detected some resentment, you would be right.  I have resigned myself to the knowledge that unless Mr. Str8 is left a vegetable and unable to stop me from forcing him to marry me… I will never be a bride.  And I am pretty ok with it.  I dream of being married.  I just really think those gays who count more sex partners than jelly beans while in a relationship should really just stay the course.  And leave marriage to the gays who are a better example of human equality, who truly are the marrying kind.  Those of us who believe in love, romance and being the only two,  in a party of two.   By the powers of blogging,  I now pronounce you rant and rant, and may you may rant on….

Leave a comment

Filed under gay, Humour, Quotes, Random, Rant, Relationships, Silly Me

Love and the Seasons of Passion

All the world evolves about the sun.  The world will have it seasons and it can be cold and cruel.  It can be warm, and full of promise of blossoms and awaking.  The rose to become full and expressing it’s beauty.  The heat and renewal of life as a pattern of eternity will see the strength of new life taking it’s steps to becoming apart of the wonder of life.  And the metamorphosis of the cycle waning, and the ebb into harvest.  Each of us moved by the seasons, the core whisper that calls to us, that speaks our names.

It is the passion of life, the passion of love, the passion of growth that commands us.  That time will march on as precise as a military squadron, and passion of duty and the experience of wonder that makes a child’s eyes wide, and the old smile with images of passions long gone.

It is passion that makes our feet move to the object of affection, the heart to beat so fast that you cannot breathe.  It makes our skin clammy and sensitive to our environment.  Our eyes respond to the sight of passion, relentless in maintaining the image for eternity.

Passion makes lovers do almost anything.  The seasons of passion as in nature, will too, roll along, everything has a season, and a season for everything.

For some, the summer of passion will last for untold kisses, caresses and intertwining of two.  For some, they say this is the best season.

Some will favour the spring of passion, the newness of love, the dawn of the new day sun, the dew on petals, so fragrant.

As in all things, the season of passion will fade, and the leaves will fall, and wither.  The passion of passion will slip away, and find shelter in places untouchable.

Passion will find itself exhausted and starved.  In the winter, it will withdrawal, and feel the chill, as it is held in place.  Buried under the freezing snow, it has life still, life we cannot see.  It is the way of passion, you see, that it will wait like the buds of a flower, beneath the cold, it knows all the passion of all it’s seasons, and will need the time of loneliness to reflect.  Passion will await the heat of the sun of a new passion.  And it will survive until the promise of passion new, when it will reach out and find the season to bloom again.

Passion, love, and all things good, you see, cannot be eternally held for just one.  Sometimes the season of passion can be sustained by endless love.  Those who are lucky to have such passion, are meant for it.  The rest, will have many seasons.  Blossoms that will find life, add to the bouquet of flowers.  Most of us will have passion of summer, only if we acknowledge that winter is a season as well.  That while we feel lost, alone, and without hope, just remember, you are a bud, and if willing to wait out the winter season, if you are open, you will arise and you will have a season of summer.  A season of passion and love will be there for us all.

You will have the sun, and all that it brings, in the season of summer.  The season of passion.  You will love. And be loved.  That is what the sun brings in the season of spring.

We all move to the beat of the heart of the seasons, and will evolve around the sun, because, the world will always spin, and seasons will always change.  As we must, for passion and for love.

Leave a comment

Filed under Relationships, Silly Me

A Man Rant

So, Honey Badger (she selected the name, I liked it) and I got to comparing some notes on our men.  Honey reminisced on her ex, and I, on you guessed it, Mr. Str8, about the annoying behaviour of some  men’s video game addiction…

Honey: Tell everyone about our rant (laughing)

Me: So Str8 has picked up another  Playstation video game. He came down for weekend.  I worked on the Sunday, so we confirmed, on the way into town in the morning, that I was off at 6:30.  He said he would leave at 6:20.  I texted him after 6pm.  After I was walking to meet him, I get a text “u off at 6:30 or 7:30?”  He got caught up playing this game, and was over 30 minutes late…..so not impressed.  Then, the very next night we agreed to meet at the market.  I texted him ten minutes away from the store.  He showed up late, 20 minutes later.  Oh, and why you may ask?  Yup, frickin video game!  Was I a happy princess?  Not so much.  He being a j-a, laughed it off. Men!

Marla: (laughs)

Honey: Ya, A-H would play his video games all night, for hours, and stay up late, even though he had to be up at 6am, he would play past 1am!  stupid.

Me: Right?  And ok, if that’s not bad enough, I leave Str8 for the day, and know he is on that blasted thing all day, and when I get home, there are dishes, and  bags and wrappers all over my counter like some junk food atom bomb went off!  It’s not like there is a garbage can under the sink, oh no, that one just leaves a mess like a teenage junkie!

Honey: (laughing) I know, they lose all sense, wasting their time.

Me: Trust me, just like Carlie said, we could strip off and do a lap dance and get pushed away like we don’t exist.  Zombies the lot of em.

Honey: Why are men like that?

Marla: Men are like overgrown kids.

Me: More or less. I don’t get it.  If I don’t respond to Str8 when he wants me to, I get flack! Now, ladies, you have to understand men are designed by biology to be the hunter.  So they hunt, watch sports, play video games or build things to keep them active, no longer the caveman that actually brought back the bacon.  Housework, cooking and cleaning, that is not a man’s job.  Do they not realize, but not paying attention and doing what we want, that they make it worse for them?

Honey: That pisses me off, because when I used to try to get him to bed, he would bitch and complain, and sulk.  (laughing)  Hey, wait, but you are still a man.. so…

Me: Gurl, I i-dent-ify…it’s not my fault God gave me the pole and not the valley.  It is a wonderful curse… I get to…

Honey: And that is where you should end this rant before it get’s triple x… Say ‘see you later’

Me:….oh… (pout) men.. I will leave it at that… see you all later..

 

We all have things that annoy us, and we can annoy our partners.  But for love, we may complain, but at the end of the day, we secretly look back and laugh.  It’s the little things that make a relationship.  No one is perfect.

 

Leave a comment

Filed under gay, Humour, Random, Rant, Relationships

Thanks for the Open Box of Chocolates, Forrest, You Gump!

If life is like a box of chocolate, it would have a variety of flavours and textures to choose from, right?  So, then, how it is that sometimes you open this mythical box of delights, and all you get are the same damn selections?  Thanks for the Open Box of Chocolates, Forrest, You Gump!

So it seems for many of us, with the hope that variety will enrich us.  Jobs.  Purchases.  Relationships.  The boxes I have seen have had pretty limited offerings.  And with job hunting on my list, I am not impressed.

 And if you think of the world and all of it’s locations, one would think, ‘hey, this is decent.’  Who has been to a club lately?  Those bonbons, then,  seem way too narrow in fillings.  And they all contain nuts.  Hard, indigestible nuts.  Hard core insane nuts.  The kind of nuts only a starved squirrel would try to keep.  My single friends, (the straight ones), say that it is slim pickins, like someone called ‘buffet’ at 9pm, and any tasty dish was gobbled up.  The dried up, nasties seem to be left in the box.  And, as one female friend added, ‘have bite marks even’.  Eewww…

Jobs seem to also fall under the same tab.  Sad little pieces, virtually no real choices.  And for many of us, a hunt for employment is being done all at once.  Like a sale on meat.  Some how, the not-so-starving shoppers get the prime cuts, while the general public get: ‘cashier for plastic pet poop products’, or ‘wanted sales manager for industrial audio cassettes company’….wtf??? I thought that at least, there would be one really delicious morsel to sink my sweet tooth into.  Oh, I thought I had done just that.  An entry level position in the exciting world of travel.  (insert ‘ooohhh’ and ‘aaahhhh’ here).  Sure.  Then the box of chocolate turned into some bad tasting dollar store crap.  By a company of gnomes, that shall remain nameless…. dashing my hopes of a good career move.  And now, in a financially have-not city, I am one of many, left to get the equivalent of an expired sweet.  I am gay, people, an ARTISTE.. whom has been a d list celebrity for more years than even Kathy Griffin!!! I hate starving, have I mentioned this?  No creamy centre for me to enjoy here, just the stale hard taffy core that will chip a tooth.

It feels like a candid camera version of the ‘support local’ ideal.  Locally, selection, well, sucks.  And some funny looking host will pop out and stick a camera in my face.  I want Laura Secord options here people, not dollar store stock of choices.  Really? 

So, while I have my own box of chocolates in the relationship  aisle, I am still combing through the meager remains of a post discount sale in the box of job treats.  And take it from me, not all boxes of chocolates are created equal. 

Hoping your selections are delectable and sweet…… Thanks for the Open Box of Chocolates, Forrest, You Gump!

Leave a comment

Filed under Humour, Random, Rant, Silly Me

NA Meeting Introduction (or How I Have No Life Thanks to Netflix)

Hello, my name is Bryon.  And I am a Netflix addict. It’s been 3 seconds since my last Netflix viewing.  Ok, I am watching it as I sit here, so please do not judge.  I have been addicted for 2 months now.  And I am paying the 7.99 a month for my supply.  I am unable to function without it.

It all started when my well meaning step-daughter helped Mr. Str8 set up the internet on the Playstation 3 on her Christmas visit to the city (ok fine, it’s Halifax, so … town).  She is the tech brains in the family.  16yrs old.  So pretty much the expert.  And once I got home from work, we discussed the option to start the 1 month free trial.  So we did.  And that is when I took took the plunge off the cliff.

It started with the marathon of ‘Sliders’…I watched every episode.  And realized why I had forgotten it.  That is one of the hard points.  I was glued to the screens of the TV or Sully (aka my laptop), every moment I could view it.  I need an inter-netflix-tion.

I have gone through all of ‘Sliders’.  2 seasons of ‘Primeval’.  All of ‘Angel’.  4 seasons and counting of ‘Bones’….Plus several movies. I m like Brittney with a new level of crazy.

Please do not judge.  Please call my family and let them know I went down with a fight.  Ok, really, we all know that is not true.  I fell to my knees like a dirty bitch.  Like a Kardashian really.  Just try to make it sound like I actually put up a challenge.  Tell them I maybe lost to them.  But I am found in the world of Netflix.

Thank you.

Leave a comment

Filed under Humour, Random, Silly Me

Wildlife of..: the Gay Bar Part 2-(A gaysexandthecity expose)

In tonight’s  episode of Wildlife, we will look at the those elusive creatures that inhabit the often sketchy territory, known simply as the  ’gay bar’.  This ain’t your parent’s Nature of Things, to be sure.

This habitat has become extremely popular among it’s wildlife.  In many parts of the world, these ‘watering holes’ have sprung up all over, growing in proportion to that of the demand for space, and variety.

While any gay can be found in these hot spots, there are many examples of the gays that frequent regularly.  And we look at the most common groups in which make the gay bar a significant part of their routine.  Scientists believe that these specific breeds of the gays, are instinctively drawn into the gay bar for gratification.  Tonight we will look at the freak’omos.

freak’omos:  Of the various breeds of the gays, these are among some of the most interesting.  They often are free spirited and move from other groups, settling in this variation.

Freak'omos want to play with you

Often premiscious, and adventurous, they enjoy layers of intimate encounters, rooted in the fetish, and kink.  Leather, chains, make-up, role-playing, S&M, they seperate themselves from the rest of the gay bar gays, making many of these other members take a stand-offish postition, unless they are seeking to experiment with this brand of behaviour.

They will often worship idols such as Adam Lambert, Lady Gaga, and the genres of music such as goth, rock,  alternative rock, grunge, and glam. 

Adam Lambert- an Icon

Outside of the gaya bar, many will maintain a mild manner ‘normal’ persona.  Others, will still dress in tribal freak attire, with colouring of their hair in blues, purples, pinks, greens, and oranges. 

They can be found at vintage shops, and will enjoy comic books, the occult, and on-line gaming.  They will engage you in conversation that weaves from intelligent to  gibberish, and be encorherent at times when they are intoxicated.

a common sighting of freak'omo gays

the freak’omos, (freak homosexuals), is termed, in an effort to classify these pecticular brand of sexually open minded and creative gays.  At the bar, they will enjoy ‘performing’ for the other gays, and will gravitate to the Queens, and the Bearitallers.

 

Leave a comment

Filed under gay, Humour, Silly Me

Coming Out: Muse & State

Coming out in any time in the history of the world surely is full of challenges.  We have pressure packed societies that maintain order and are suppose to exact justice for all.  That’s how it should work.

How did humanity become so divided, that we exist in bubbles from each other?  Ok, we all get the basics; the history and geography classes we took in high school should have given us a point of reference.

We know that humans evolved, by whatever means at their disposal.  That they somehow figured out that staying put with the comfort of numbers, of growing and herding food, was better than aimlessly wandering the wilds.  They needed to keep people in these groups, so laws, religions and social hierarchy  became to be formed.  Each group had their own concerns, challenges.  People were people, no matter where and some things would occur…. Well, anyway, these early societies began to develop and grow.

Sex has always been a difficult issue, one we refuse to talk about but not ashamed to practice.

We would have our independent say about our bodies and who and what we did.  We were in control of ourselves.  This didn’t often sit well with leaders, political and religious alike.  They believed they had the power over their people, that each one had a responsibility to serve these leaders.  This seems to have substantially altered human evolution.  That for the most part, sex was about reproduction, nothing more.

Fast forward, to the civilizations that forever shaped who and what we are:  Britain, Rome, Greece, and all of those other greats of Asia.  The most influence and dominance have come from these forces.

Each one set upon a path of it’s own.  Religions took the reins of guidance and power.  Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, Hindu, among others, have and still weld the might of nations and spiritualism. Here is where the waters of human existence get muddied.

The modern world has suffered untold maladies, witnessed horrors and atrocities unmentionable.  All of which is far from over.  We are in the midst of the middle bouts of battles on the war of human freedoms, acceptance, rights and openness.

How many of us from our own part of the world have looked out beyond the cages of our lives, and wondered if there were others like us?  Maybe not everyone; maybe not yet.  But at some point in being alive, we question ourselves, our world, and our role in it.  Some question early, and seek answers.  Most push it aside, to try to ignore it.  Still, many more process the world and then it affects them later on; only now to add their own imposed feelings and responses from the society they now see in a different light.

Sex.  We try to classify, to compartmentalize and categorize sex and how we define ourselves in regards to sex.  It took scores of civilizations, of maturity and hardships to finally allow humans to be considered: straight, gay, bisexual, transgendered; even plain old queer.

To come out, is to put yourself out there, no just as another human being, but now labeled as something else.  Straight folk have the advantage, as it is the core of sexuality.  It is accepted that all of us are heterosexual, until we provide evidence to the contrary.  How we talk, walk, laugh, run, drive, eat, dance, sing and shop- the list is endless. On these cold hard facts, we are judged as to our sexual orientation.  We even have named the detection system used to weed out those not straight.  Gay-dar.  Intuition that often fails us, this is the secret weapon.  Personality and intimate feelings of self, and subsequent expression of these aside, we are forever distracted by figuring each other out.  Instead of coming out ourselves.

The idea of disclosure is a pure one.  Humans are needy as well as independent.  Some are ok with being ordinary.  Of deception and protective of their privacy.  Some embrace the world of their gender specific roles, and act accordingly.  They can enjoy and be happy in their decision, or suffer dire consequences.  Many will at some point stand up to the society in which they live, and place themselves in the line of view and scrutiny of the whole world, good and bad.  We all come out, show the world who we are.  True colours.

Family is a resource, as well a source of anguish.  The younger and more certain the person, the more pressure on them, to paint a label on themselves.  As to the position they will take so that others can pick their own spot.  The ones who support, the ones who denounce and the ones who torture.

Outside of family, I never once regretted being openly gay.  I found great open, loving and kind people, the most surprising, and the most refreshingly positive, were the men I knew.  At work, in the real world, in the ‘mature’ world, I found wonderful experiences.  But to strangers, on public transit, on public spaces, the bullies appeared.  Not since school (college, to be sadly accurate) did some of the worst offenses to the weaker and lost souls really mark those souls. I was picked on endlessly.  Mostly about being gay.  I feel guilty, that I was not good at hiding the truth (because I believe I always knew in my heart), and they were punishing me for fibbing.  If only it was that simple.  I wonder.  If I stood up and screamed loud that I was, would it have been different?  One way or the other.  But I took the easy way out of that situation, and suffered a lifetime of trying to have self-confidence and self worth.

The most important family learned the truth, when secrecy from my parents became less important.  Both parents would never know the truth before the grave.  I dream of the perfect family in which I could have been me, myself & I.  But coming out to all of my family was the easiest thing.  Suffering the worst pain of not being able to be myself to my parents, and the best feeling of being true to myself with my sisters and her  family and of being loved.  Everyone else is secondary.  I love my family, but being wanted is great, but not mandatory.

Coming out is very personal, a decision that affects, effects and challenges the best of us.  As humans, no matter where you live, in what society, in any time, we must be true to ourselves.

Sex is personal, but there has to be a common line each of us can start from, to share the goodness, and even the bad of life, to be kind to all.

If we all have a point of reference that we as individuals can grow from, then we will be better humans, for the future, for the species, and be honest and brave, to come out and feel the sun.  To be stronger as people,  as a family.  To come out, whatever that means to you.  To not hide the light, not hide the reason for you being who you are.  To set up a safe place in families, friends, schools, and communities, for anyone to come out, and be accepted.

The world has changed, in many regards.  Humans still working to find our way.  Coming out is a major, often life altering event for many, those who sum up the courage will tell you.  It is a rite of passage for those not straight.  I say, why not all human beings do the same?  Why not every one of us, stand up and come out, declare yourself to the world?  Could the world be a better place, if we just make things a little bit more equal, and not just pay lip service to the ideal? 

Coming out is a major turning point for anyone willing to expose themselves.  We try to be seen, want to be accepted for who we are, no matter the colour, creed, or feelings we have.  So many will not have the chance to be free to do so.  Is it not the village that should raise the children?  Are we not civilized enough yet to give our futures the chance to flourish? 

 

Leave a comment

Filed under Random

Wildlife of..: the Gay Bar Part 1-(A gaysexandthecity expose)

In tonight’s debut episode of Wildlife, we will look at the those elusive creatures that inhabit the often sketchy territory, known simply as the  ‘gay bar’.  This aint your parent’s Nature of Things, to be sure.

This habitat has become extremely popular among it’s wildlife.  In many parts of the world, these ‘watering holes’ have sprung up all over, growing in proportion to that of the demand for space, and variety.

While any gay can be found in these hot spots, there are many examples of the gays that frequent regularly.  And we look at the most common groups in which make the gay bar a significant part of their routine.  Scientists believe that these specific breeds of the gays, are instinctively drawn into the gay bar for gratification.  They have identified these 3 most common of the gays:

the hag fag gays party with their gurls..but looks like these two may pair off...

The Hag Fags: are mostly attractive, but sometimes not so much.  They will only venture into the gay bars with the support of members of the opposite sex (females, for those who only study the gays), those friends that will allow this breed to pretend that they are not interested in availability of potential mates.  These use their female companions as winghags.  If they have the opportunity to hook up with a hottie, they will abandon the hags without much fanfare.  They in fact, are actually performing a form a mating ritual, on the mating display ground, known as the ‘dancefloor’.  They shake, shimmy, grind, flaunt, tease, wink, and many can be seen making a rather spectacle of themselves. They feel safe with these female pack members, providing a cover for their own non-commitment and lack of desire to mate with the various other members of the gays in the gay bar. They, like most gays, have high level of ego, and can be known to flirt on the dancefloor.  Unless they set sights on a specific gay of interest, they may get lucky.  Mostly, the hag fags are out to dance.

the gawker (stalker) gay- make no mistake, it looks fine, but it is out to feed. Hi, what's your size?

The Gawkers (AKA stalkers): This breed of gays, will observe, and ‘scope’ out, or ‘cruise’, the available selections of other gays, waiting to entice a gay who returns the interest.  They will consume as much alcohol as they can, and stalk a partner for pleasure.  They will instigate conversation, flirt with and attempt to attract a companion.  They will attempt to seperate their intended victim random encounter, from it’s group.   They are usually seeking a one night stand, and like a lioness, can locate the easiest of prey. And hoping for the best abilities… These pleasure seekers are more than just responding to basic sexual urges.  They are much more demanding.  Please be cautious. This breed can be aggressive.

these are dangerous, egoist gays-admire from afar...

Narcisissies: These are among the most crafty and manipulative of the gays.  They appear to be extremely vain, well-groomed and self-absorbed.  They will spend time looking at themselves in mirrors.  Apply make-up and lip gloss, fix hair, and take pictures of themselves with their cell phones.  They often will travel in packs consisting of hag fags and their hags, other narcisissies, dancefloor divas, gossip gurls, and sometimes, the daddies.  They will expose as much of their best features as they can, while mingling and working a trail of their pheromones in an effort to maximize attention and interest.  They will flirt, behave in wild and what they believe to be carefree actions.  They are generally the most feminine of gays.  They are not full fledge queens, or drags, but these young, experimenting gay youths will gender bend, by incorporating female clothing, accessories, and actions of a female in heat.   Be warned: these gurlybois will play with other, as well as other attractive youths, but will seek out sugar daddies to care for them. Do Not Buy These gays Drinks, unless you are willing to risk humiliation, as they will ‘work it’, and then find something more attractive and financially secure, and leave you frustrated.

 And stay tuned for part 2,  of the wildlife of the gay bar.  Coming soon.  Check local listings and time zones for the best chance to learn more about the gays in the bar.

2 Comments

Filed under gay, Humour, Silly Me