Marriage (or wedlock) is a social union or legal contract between people that creates kinship. The definition of marriage varies according to different cultures, but is usually an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged. Such a union, often formalized via a wedding ceremony, may also be called matrimony. Many cultures limit marriage to two persons of the opposite sex, but some allow forms of polygamous marriage, and some recognize same-sex marriage. In some conservative cultures, marriage is recommended or compulsory before pursuing any sexual activity.
People marry for many reasons, including one or more of the following: legal, social, libidinal, emotional, economic, spiritual, and religious. These might include arranged marriages, family obligations, the legal establishment of a nuclear family unit, the legal protection of children and public declaration of commitment.The act of marriage usually creates normative or legal obligations between the individuals involved. Some cultures allow the dissolution of marriage through divorce or annulment. (as from wikipedia)
Recently, I learned of a gay couple who seem to be engaged, as per a social media status update. I am very much a supporter of marriage, gay or otherwise, in relation to love, and the commitment of two individuals. I am a romantic, believe in love, and the soul mate ideal. The above two paragraphs are from wikipedia. In the second, it gives reasons for many to decide to be married. I do not presume to know the workings of someone else’s relationship….however…
It has taken way too long for humanity to deal with each other, to have a fair and equal world. I know, not there yet but a work in progress. Rights granted, blah blah…
My issue is that this: If we fight for rights and equality, then shouldn’t we have some level of respect for the things we have? Freedom of will and liberty is great. But if gays can marry, should not we attempt to honourable?
Straight couples have enjoyed the highs and lows of marriage from the beginning. And while there are those that disrespect the institution and what it stands for, and there are those, as well, who value its ideals and beliefs. With so many hetros on their own narrow view point, it makes gay marriage difficult if it is not done for the purest of reasons: love. Man/woman marriages have been for love, money, and a myriad of reasons. Let us face this: gay rights may picking up speed in our world, but stereotypes remain. Gays are seen as dirty, promiscuous, and an afront to the meaning of marriage. So, if a couple of gays who are looking to get hitched for concerns of finance, or status, rather than love and being only 2 joined in intimacy, then, how in the name of all that is Elton John, can we get away from being the demon if we put it all out there? that we say, meh, marriage ok even if it’s not for love. Really?
Why would a couple of sleep-around-seths want to get married? Sure, makes senes for the straights. Look step-ford family, raise kids, but really, you are schlanking the rest of the suburban street, at the ‘swappers’ party. You would need marriage to be the beard, if you all are bed hopping. Well, gays do that regardless. Unless we got kids, there is no real need to get into matrimony other than love. Ok you may say, not so. Seriously? ok then, let’s see. Money/finances? How about investments? RRSPs? Will marriage make this couple I know of better? Hardly. If they give up trying to win the skank equivalent of the Best Picture Oscar, then meh, ok. They marry for love. Forsake all others. I ll buy them a blender.
However, if we think that just because we now can marry, should we? The straights have the corner on seedy, secret, scandalous sexual affairs of married couples. Really, for us gays, we accept this, rather embrace this, and damn many of us are good at being tramps. So, maybe thanks to that fabulous other red head Julia Roberts and that fine (well, not so recently) Richard Gere, the gays got the marriage bug. That even though they are amateur porn stars, they too can live the dream.
If gays make the committment to tie the knot, then why can’t they do it for the spirit and the letter of marriage? And make it about romance and not how many times you can play
hide wet twirl the cabaret stick…. And if you detected some resentment, you would be right. I have resigned myself to the knowledge that unless Mr. Str8 is left a vegetable and unable to stop me from forcing him to marry me… I will never be a bride. And I am pretty ok with it. I dream of being married. I just really think those gays who count more sex partners than jelly beans while in a relationship should really just stay the course. And leave marriage to the gays who are a better example of human equality, who truly are the marrying kind. Those of us who believe in love, romance and being the only two, in a party of two. By the powers of blogging, I now pronounce you rant and rant, and may you may rant on….